The Hawke Tames the Wolf
by prfctlyflawed36
Summary: Takes place in Act III right before Fenris meets his sister. Varric didn't know everything about their reconciling, this is what happened. FemHawke/Fenris Rated M for eventual smut.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey everyone, thank you so much for reading. This is my first fanfic that I have really taken seriously. I, like many others are completely taken by that damn beautiful elf. I felt there was so much more than could be divulged. I would love it if you would R&R, I would appreciate it greatly.  
>I do not own any of the characters in this story, though I would love for Fenris to own me =3<strong>

Prologue

Hawke had been in Fereldon for many years now, cleansing he town of scum, taking down powerful enemies that wished to control the town, all around being a protector of a sort. She had become The Champion by purging the town of the Quanari. Making a name for the Hawke family, and herself. She had fame, fortune and good group of friends. However, after everything she's been through she did not have the thing that she wanted most, the person she wanted most.

* * *

><p>Hawke was lounging in her library reading a book on the psychological manifestations of former slaves, this was no rainy day leisure read, she had a purpose.<p>

"_If I only could understand what's going on in that beautiful head of his_," she thought to herself, "_then maybe…", _she let a sigh escape her when she thought of that night where with a sudden pounce he glowed brilliant blue, pushing her against the wall, raw passion and emotion flooding the both of them. Sweetness was offered, but only a bitter taste was left in her mouth.

She remembered every detail of that night, and went over it a thousand times in her head_. _

"_I'm sorry…I feel like such a fool. All I wanted was to be happy at least for a little while," _he turned around, his back to her, _"Please, forgive me." _she watched his slender figure silently walking away from her. Her heart ripping apart, as if it was being pulled apart into millions of small insignificant pieces. He left without hesitating, leaving whatever relationship they had behind but he did not leave her life completely. They still were…associates, not very much companions anymore, as she kept him at a distance, and he did the same as well. They exchanged occasional fake pleasantries, and forced awkward conversations. He had said a couple times that he enjoyed following her, and she was unsure how to take his comment, all she could do say was, "Is that so?". Unfortunately he was her best warrior, the most skilled at using a blade to strike down foes, and she brought him along with nearly every quest that they went on, she possibly did this to keep him close to her, as close as he could be anyway.

She read, and read about different slaves that escaped, that started new lives but still felt like they will forever be enslaved by their own memories. Some had been able to move on, but such a scarring thing was almost impossible to forget. She was worried he would never return to her, that she would live out the years longing for him, barely speaking. She could feel her eyelids growing heavy, she closed her book and sat there a moment, staring into the blazing fire. It reminded her of the fire that she felt in her that night he took her into him. Many times before she wanted to bring it up, to just ask if he regretted it, if had any ounce of compassion for her. Just anything. She could never come close to questioning him, words could not describe how she felt. She only assumed he wanted nothing to do with it. The only glimmer of hope was that he wore her red scarf around his wrist, and her crest on his hip, she contemplated many times what this could possibly mean but, nothing made any sense to her. He had told her that night, the way he spoke before he left, made it sound like it shouldn't have happened in the first place, so why would he wear that blighted thing? Clenching her jaw to fight the tears that came every night, Hawke angrily rose from her chair and ascended to her bedroom, slowly contemplating each step. Every thing in her room, in her house, hell in that town reminded her of him, and every time she was reminded her chest felt heavy.

* * *

><p>Hawke walked into The Hanged Man joining Varric, Isabella, and Fenris at the table. The bar was fairly quiet today, only a few people scattered about, some passed out from the night before. It was late morning, and they were meeting so Varric could give them the latest rumors.<p>

She nodded to them collectively, "Hello everyone, how are you all?".

"I'm doing wonderful! Last night after losing to these lot I found a dashing man willing to buy me drinks. We drank up more than just the ale last night," Isabella boasted with her classic smile.

"Doin' great Hawke, got more coin than I had last night thanks to Rivaini," Varric let out a boisterous laugh, "though I did lose most of it to Broody here."

Hawke quietly giggled, her eyes fell on Fenris who was staring at her, very intently. She felt her heart skip and inhaled, "Fenris." His staring intimidated her, it was harsh and intense, more so than usual.

"Hawke," he nodded, holding her gaze with those brilliant green eyes of his.

She looked quickly away, not wanting to stare at those ice cold jade eyes any longer, her heart bounded in her chest, she swore if it beat any harder, it would arise from her chest and punch him the face. The others always caught the awkwardness between them, and tried to defer it with conversation.

Varric was the first to usually speak and try to get things on track, "Well, comrades, I've heard that there are a group of travelers out near the Wounded Coast. They've been causing some trouble, but it all was very vague. It sounded intriguing with all the mystique surround in, so I accepted. How does that sound Hawke?"

"Sounds good, I need a change around here." Hey eyes unwillingly flickered to Fenris, she noticed a slight difference in his expression, slightly softened but still fierce.

Isabella smiled, "Good, then shall we go? I've been itching for something to do…besides muscular men."

* * *

><p>After their efforts of searching the Wounded Coast proved futile, they returned to The Hanged Man. There was not a trace of anyone on the Coast, not even raiders.<p>

"Well...that was strange. Did anyone think so? Not a single person, no assassins, no raiders, nothing!" Hawke mused, throwing her hands up.

"Agreed, that damn place is never quiet, even if we go there for something small, some blighted group is always there to get in our way." Varric said.

"It seemed kind of peaceful really, maybe we could visit the beach for once, and not be ambushed!" Isabella suggested, she knew Hawke was wearing thin and needed a break.

"I don't know…" Hawke thought about a vacation, it sounded wonderful to her, "it sounds like it could be a terrible idea, but we may never get another opportunity like this again, huh?"

"Yes! I'm going to pack," Isabella grinned "Shall we invite everyone? I'd like to test the waters with that handsome mage we have."

Fenris scoffed, "You would be as low to lay with that abomination."

"Hey, I can't have you so, I have to settle you know."

Fenris shot her a glare that would drop anyone else dead. Isabella just smirked and winked at him, Hawke looked down at her feet, not wanting to see his reaction.

"Oh, Rivaini you're mouth opens far too much. Let's just go gather everyone else. We'll meet back here in two hours." He grabbed Isabella's arm and pulled her out of the Hanged Man.

They were left alone, and the tension between them was unbearable. She was avoiding his gaze like it was the blight. She took a deep breath and exhaled it, turning her head quickly to face him. He was staring intently, right at her again with that intense cold glare. She winced, and clenched her jaw, they sat staring at each other for what felt like eternity.

Fenris grimaced, shook his head and pushed himself up and started towards the door, he stopped and looked down past her, not meeting her eyes, "I will see you there, unless you do not wish me to go."

Hawke felt like she was punched in the heart, she had no idea how to respond to this. _Why would I want you there. You will only ruin my time with your brooding and making me long for you. Of course I want you there, you stupid, silly, beautiful man. _She sighed unsure of what to say, "If you want to come, then come. I'm sure the others would like you to be there." _Please come, please, _she hoped.

He nodded, "Then I will see you there, Hawke." he continued his movement towards the door and walked out.

Hawke finally let out the breath that she was holding during that small exchange, she had no idea that he was in just as much pain she was. If only they both weren't so stubborn.

* * *

><p>Fenris hastily walked back to his Hightown mansion, his jaw clenched and eyes fixed straight in front of him.<p>

_That woman. Why does she do this to me? It's been three years, THREE YEARS! I still cannot forget her touch, I think of nothing else but her. _He pulled the door open and slammed it shut in one swift movement. Returning to his room, he sat by the fire and took a swig of the wine he kept there. _Camping, ugh. It's bad enough I must follow her day, by day and now we'll spend 24 hours together. _He tightened his eyes closed, he had regretted every day that he had left her. _I had to, I couldn't be with her. I…I am not right. There's nothing I can give her, nothing good._

He looked at the table next to him, focusing on a note. He reached over, grabbed it from the table and read aloud, "Your sisters name is Varania, she will be at the Hanged man in a week, and will be there for one week. Don't waste this chance Fenris, you will regret it." He growled and crumpled the paper up, like he had many time over, and threw it in the fire place. _I can't…I can't. Danarius will surely be there. Waiting for me. Coming to take back! _He threw the bottle of wine against the wall, flew up from his seat knocking it down, and started to destroy his room. He threw anything he could get his hands on, kicked over each chair, and then found his glowing fist punching into the wall. Fenris was out of breathe from thrashing around the room, he just wanted peace but he felt that it was futile. He was terrified of meeting his sister, for so long he had been hell bent on his beliefs. Finding and destroying Danarius would give him satisfaction, but what comes after that he was unsure of, he found comfort in his vengeance and misery. Finding his sister meant finding out about his past, which was a sour thing to him. He had no memories of them, except for that night when he and Hawke…

He winced at the though of her, no pain he had felt from his past was close to this. He had hurt the one person that accepted him, that wanted him around. It was…utterly terrifying to him. Who would really want him around? What good could he possibly do? He sighed, _Nothing. I did her no good…She will never forgive me._ He slumped down onto the floor and lifted his hand to his face, silently fearing what he felt for this beautiful person, and knowing that she was the only one that could help him. He had to make it right…somehow.

* * *

><p>Hawke was packing some things for the vacation that they had planned, she was excited to have some time to just be a normal person, but she wished that this entire thing between her and Fenris were not so prevalent. It clouded her thoughts daily, and tainted anything good that happened. He had found his way into her heart, and then shred it to pieces on his way out. She hated herself for letting him get to her this much.<p>

She jumped with Bodhan knocked on the door, "Sorry to interrupt but you have a message on your desk, it seemed urgent. I just wanted to let you know, meserre."

She nodded, "Thank you, I will take a look on my way out."

Hawke snapped her bag shut, slung it around her shoulders and walked down the stairs, stopping at her writing desk she looked at the note it read, "Fenris would like to speak to you at his mansion." Her heart stopped the second she read his name, she touched the note with her fingers and silently breathed his name. She pursed her lips and inhaled, bracing herself for what this would entail.

"Thank you Bodhan, I will be gone for a day. Please take this time off and watch over the mansion for me." She walked out the door quickly, making her way to _his_ house.

She arrived at his house, and heard speaking other than Fenris, as she got closer to the door she could gather that it was Aveline.

As she walked into the room Aveline rose from her chair and turned around starting for the door.

"You talk to him Hawke, I've had my fill for today." Aveline said plainly and left the mansion.

Hawke was tense, she didn't know what was going on, why Aveline would have been here. She had so many questions, but she waited for him to speak.

"Venhedes fasta vass," Fenris swore and put his hands to the table, looking down.

"Maybe I can help Fenris…"

He quietly growled, "It's my sister. I didn't tell you but I followed up on Hadriana's information. Everything she said was true, I had to keep it quiet but I eventually contacted Varania and sent her coin enough to come meet me here. Now she's here."

Hawke sat and listened intently, watching him as he explained it all, she could tell that this bothered him greatly and wanted nothing more than to help him. What she really wanted to do was go over to him and hug him so tightly, and tell him she'd do anything for him, but she resisted. Whenever their eyes met, she would see that intense stare from earlier, and every time she held in a small shudder.

After admitting that he was afraid it was a trap, Hawke agreed to help, he then confessed to her, "It would mean a lot to me, that's all I ask." He looked right at her, with that look that makes her melt, his eyes begged for her.

Hawke nodded, "Of course Fenris. We will go as soon as we get back tomorrow."

There was a long moment of silence between them as they both took in the emotions swirling between them. It was like a fire blazing around them. This was the first time they had really spoke to each other, and it was only because he needed her help, but she knew it wasn't just that, he needed her because he needed **her**, he wanted her there. She felt some sort of hope in this situation, _maybe he'd get the closure he needs…maybe this will be a new beginning_, she thought.

She rose from her chair, "Well…it's about time to meet them. Are…you going to go?"

Fenris looked at her, "Yes…I think I will actually. It might be nice to just get away for a day," he shrugged his shoulders.

They both looked at each other and genuinely smiled at each other for the first time in years. _Tonight may not be as bad after all, _they both thought.


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you for reading everyone. I was going to wait until tomorrow to post the next chapter but I decided to go ahead and post it. The first time I went to the Wounded Coast I thought how neat it'd be to camp on one of the shores. It always seems to be nice weather too ^_^ I always felt like there was no possible way Hawke and Fenris avoided their relationship for three years, so I added in some stuff, it's nothing too off canon.  
>Again please R&amp;R if you like it, hate it, or what have you. I have more chapters ready to post if it's wanted!<br>I own absolutely nothing from Dragon Age 2, but the game owns every waking minute of my day!**

The sun shone brightly, a light breeze swayed the surrounds trees back and forth, allowing some comfort from dry heat. The weather could not have been better for a trip to the coast.

"This looks like a lovely spot! There's trees, sand, water and no bad guys wanting to beat us up!" Merrill chimed, she was probably the most excited.

"This does look like a rather fetching spot, compared to the rest of the coast." Isabella exclaimed surveying her surroundings.

"And look! That rock looks like a table, like a little table made for Dwarves," Merrill giggled.

"Hey now, Daisy," Varric put his hand up in a false defense, "Dwarves don't use, 'little tables', we use finally crafted works of art to sit at. Just what are you trying to say?" He smirked at her

"Oh, nothing!" She said in a sing-song voice.

"Maybe it's that you all are too short for normal sized tables. You need special tables." Fenris dryly spoke up

"And you can have your own table, we'll label it 'The Brooders Table'" Varric laughed heartily and gave Fenris a good jab.

"I do not brood, Dwarf"

"Sure, sure, and I don't tell stories," he waved away Fenris' comment, "Anyway, I'm setting up my tent. Who wants to start the fire?"

"I can do it," out came a burst of fire from Anders' staff right into a pile of conveniently placed wood, "All done." He grinned.

"Well that works too." Varric raised his eyebrow at Anders.

Hawke smiled at the amusing banter from everyone, this is what helped her keep her spirits up. Except when they sometimes say things and don't think, like when Merrill exclaimed in front of everyone that Fenris was in love, and all he said was, "No I'm not." She tried as hard as she could, to act like she didn't hear the conversation, if Fenris and herself were brought up, she just ignored it. Anders liked to bring it up the most, she cared for him like a brother but he just couldn't let it go, and probably never would.

Hawke had planned to use this time to swim since the weather was perfect, her favorite thing was going swimming, seeing how deep she could go. She loved the adrenaline rush of nearly running out of air, but always knowing her limits. She looked around and decided to set her tent up nearest to the beach, so she could slip away and go swimming easier without someone making a big deal about her swim clothes. They weren't exactly modest, all Hightown had was this red one piece, that she thought looked like something you'd wear for your lover, not out swimming, but it was the only thing the store had. Opening her bag, she took out some food that she brought and gave it to Merrill who planned on being their cook for the night. She brought some fish, some rolls, and some tasty vegetables from the secret garden she had. She saw Fenris grimace when she handed Merrill the fish, and she shook her head, _that's right, he hates fish. Oh well, he can just deal with it._

* * *

><p>They sat around the fire joking and laughing. Each one shared stories about their past, or made up stories if you were Varric. Fenris just sat by and watched, he had no stories he wanted to share, and no one bothered him either. Isabella, Merrill and Anders decided to take a swim before eating dinner while Varric, Hawke and Fenris played diamondback. Thankfully, Varric brought much alcohol along, rather, all he brought was alcohol and Hawke used the alcohol to her advantage, it made being around Fenris much easier.<p>

Laughter and splashing erode from behind them, "Be careful Daisy! Don't go in too far!" Varric yelled out.

Merrill waved back at him with a giant smile and Isabella tackled her under water.

"So protective, I wonder if someone has a crush. You **did** tell me you weren't into humans, but never spoke of elves." Hawke teased, giving him a sly smirk.

"If I were you, I wouldn't be brining up crushes of any kind, Hawke." Varric bit back playfully.

_That no beard devil, _she thought shooting him a look, "You're money is mine, I win." She showed her winning hang to them both.

"This is why I only play with Donnic, he's terrible." Fenris shook his head.

"Ah, good job, Hawke. I'll have to find a way to win back my pride somehow."

"I'm going to go off for a walk, I won't be too long. If I don't return in an hour, I'm probably taken captive by some random group of assassins trying to kill me." Hawke proclaimed, with her usual sarcastic tone.

"I'll call everyone in shortly and we'll start cooking the food. They've got to be water-logged by now! Have fun." Varric waved to her, gathering up the cards.

Hawke nodded and started off up the trail, it was getting a little darker now, the sunset could be seen from a higher vantage point and she wanted to watch it fall.

"You're not going to go with her? Stupid elf." Varric scoffed.

"And why would she want me to go with her?" Fenris asked completely puzzled.

"Like I said…stupid elf." Varric shook his head and turned down towards the beach

Fenris stood there, confused. _She just wants to be alone…there's no reason why should want me around. What if something happens though? What if someone really does attack her, or a group of someones. Ugh, I should go with her…maybe if I just trail her. Yes, that'd be better. _Growling to himself, he started off slowly after her, making sure to keep his distance. He couldn't imagine how embarrassing it would be if she caught him following her, though he could just play it up as Varric made him do it, like she'd believe that.

He followed her up the trail, keeping out of sight and using his elf ways to be silent. Finally, she stopped on top of a hill and looked over the edge. Fenris hid behind a group of trees right behind her. Hawke sat down and gazed out towards the sea, watching the sun fall into the water. He wished nothing more that he could be sitting beside her, sharing this moment instead of apart.

Hawke sighed, she cleared her mind focusing on the sunset. Noticing every color blend together, the oranges, and yellows that made a brilliant gold, and as the sun went down farther there was a deep red that ungulfed the sun, slowly turning into darkness. She suddenly felt something was wrong…her peace that washed over her was being drained from her. This feeling, this was the feeling she got when someone was close on her heel. _Someone is here_ she thought, _I could either freak out or…play it off._

"Would you like to come and watch the sunset with me, or are you going to just sit back there and be creepy?"

Fenris froze in place. His breathing stopped, his thinking stopped and his heart stopped.

"Well? What is it?"

He started walking out from behind the trees apprehensively, "S-sorry. I didn't mean to-"

Hawke whipped around in one motion rising to her feet to face him, "Fenris? I didn't know it was you, frankly I didn't know who it was." She stopped, unsure of what to say. The two of the stood there awkwardly, until Hawke looked at him quixotically.

"What?" Fenris asked sharply.

"Did you follow me all the way up here? Is something the matter? Everything's alright?"

"No, no nothings wrong. Yes…I did follow you, though. Varric just wanted to make sure you would be okay, so he insisted that I came." _Ugh, you actually used that excuse, you fool, _he thought.

She squinted at him, trying to read him, "I see," she stared at him, and he cast his gaze down, "Well, I was just about to head back anyway. Shall we?"

He nodded and waited for her to go ahead of him, he followed behind her a few feet, watching her, wishing he could just say something, anything that wasn't stupid.

She stopped suddenly and he nearly ran into her, she huffed and turned around, "Fenris I-"

"We should really get back. I'm sure they are waiting for us to eat," he cut her off, he didn't want to know what she was going to say, no he did, he just was afraid of what it would be.

"No, I want to say this and I'm going to say it now. I don't understand, and I will never understand, not unless you explain yourself. I see the way you look-"

He grabbed her arms and looked her in the eye with a look that took her breathe away, "Please," he pleaded, "I can't. Not yet. Not now…"

Her heart sank into the pit of her stomach, she felt tears well up into her eyes, she blinked hard "Forget it then." she turned around, quickened her pace back to the camp.

He sighed, "Venhedes." he brought his hand up to his hair, and ran his fingers through it, "Just…a little longer Hawke. Give me time." he whispered to himself.

Everyone was now gorged on fish, fruit, desserts and roasted vegetables. There was little left and they all sat around the fire joking and drinking. Varric was telling a store about two hideous dwarf women that fought over him when he was lad, Merrill sat intently next to him drinking up his silly story. Isabella looked over to Hawke and rolled her eyes, smirking. Hawke returned the look, everyone knew his stories were bullshit, except Merrill, she adored them.

* * *

><p>Hawke waited in her tent, feigning tiredness. She retired to wait until everyone went to sleep. The main reason she came on this trip was to go swimming, to get that adrenaline rush. She heard the last of the goodnights outside, and waited until she heard no one stir. She swiftly slipped into her bathing suit, peeked outside to make sure the coast was clear and started to the water. The water was nearly perfect, if anything it was almost too warm, she swam out deeper her toes brushed near the bottom of the beach floor, she dove underwater and swam faster and farther out. Coming up to take a breathe she emerged from under water, taking long deep breaths. This was exactly what she needed.<p>

Fenris lie awake, his arms folded under his head. He was thinking about how he should approach meeting his sister, imaging different ways that it would go down. How could he talk to her? What would he talk about? His mind was going in circles. What if she resented him? What if she wanted to live with him? That could never work. He tried to not even think about the fact that it might be a set-up, and that Danarius would be there to take him back. That was not going to happen, he would not allow it. Suddenly Fenris was snapped out of his thoughts when he heard someone moving out of their tent. He was curious as to who it was, so he waited a moment and pulled his tent open, looking out, he saw Hawke's silhouette moving towards the beach, she appeared to be wearing very little clothes, if anything as far as he could tell. He watched his slip in the water and dive under, mindlessly, he rose from out of his tent and walked to the shore, watching her. She was absolutely the most beautiful thing he had ever saw, she was completely uninhibited now, she looked so carefree and light. He continued to watch her swim farther and farther, occasionally diving under the water and then rising to the surface. Until, he felt his heart stop, Hawke did not rise from the surface as she usually did. Fearing what might happen, he quickly started into the water after her, swimming at full speed.

Fenris swam hard and fast, moving to where he had seen her last, he stopped, waiting a moment to see if her seen her anywhere, and then started pushing farther out, his heart was pumping, he was repeating in his head _no, no, no, NO, NO! _over and over again. He stopped when he saw bubbles coming up from below him, about a foot away, then he saw a figure rising to the surface. Hawke flew up out of the water and started heaving for air, her lungs empty of any oxygen. He flew over to her, grabbing her arms and pulling her toward him, holding her up.

Hawke had her eyes closed for so long underwater, when she came up they needed to adjust, so all she saw was someone next to her. She blinked a couple times, pushing the water out and gaining focus.

"Are you alright?" He furrowed his brow and stared at her intently, worried.

She inhaled and exhaled sharply, "I'm fine," she stared at him, utterly confused, "What in Maker's name are you doing out here?"

"I-I saw you go into the water and then you didn't come up for awhile. I apologize, I thought you were drowning." He looked down, completely embarrassed that he had overreacted.

She let out a laugh which surprised him, "You thought I was drowning? Me?" She was now in a laughing fit.

He couldn't help but start chuckling along with her, after all it was kind of silly. How could he possibly think that Hawke would drown? She is the most capable woman he knows. There they were together, treading water and laughing. Their laughter slowly quieted and then all that was heard was their breathing and the slight splashing of the water underneath their arms. She was staring at him, but he could not make out her face as well as she could his. The moon lit his face up brilliantly, his moss green eyes flickered in the light, and his hair almost appeared to glow. She couldn't stop staring at him, and even though he couldn't see her, he stared intently at her wanting nothing more than to grab her and just explain everything to her.

His words pierced the air around them, "I'll…be going. I'm sorry for-" he stopped, unsure of how to word it, "Ah, I just apologize."

He turns slowly, starting to swim back towards the shore. Hawke grabs his arm, halting him, "Fenris…wait."

Instinctively his lyrium flares, a pulse of energy flows through him and the area around glows with a blue aura. He turns around and pushes his hand behind her neck, thrusting her towards him, smashing his lips against hers. He pushes his tongue against her lips, pleading for her to open them, he nibbles on her lower lip and slides his tongue in against hers. He's completely overtaken by his desire for her.

Hawke's heart is pounding, all in one moment he was brightly glowing in front of her, grabbing her and kissing her. She had no time to react, and melted when his lips touched hers. She didn't want it to stop, and she couldn't stop it even if she tried. She pulled away to take a breath, while Fenris kissed her neck lightly up and down.

"Wh-what was that about?" He did not reply to her, he only kept kissing her neck, switching from her left side to the right side of her neck, "Fenris?" She demanded, pulling him away from her.

He suddenly realized what he had just done, he blinked "I-I am so sorry. I should go." He turned around but did not move.

"Wait, what? You're just going to leave again? Really?"

The words pierced him like a dagger in the heart, he turned around to look at her, he slid in hand behind her neck and looked her in the eyes, pleading with her to understand, "Please, just…soon. Give me time…" His own heart fell into the pit of his stomach at the words he was saying. He let his hand fall, drifting across her cheek. She was left alone, again. She didn't understand his words, it was like he was speaking Arcanum to her. She just watched him glide away from her, like he did three years before.


	3. Chapter 3

**Ah, thanks everyone so much for favoring/following and for my first review =D You guys bestow me with confidence to actually publish this, and write more. I feel like this improves somewhat on their reconciling, just to give it more explanation rather than Hawke just saying, "I understand". Please review it for me! If you want to see something changed, or if you feel something is off. I'd love outside opininons, because I can't ask my fiance to read it, he thinks I'm silly already!  
>I own none of the characters in this story, they all belong to Bioware, who I think made a deal with a demon to make such amazing character.<strong>

Hawke bid farewell to her companions, and started back to her estate. Fenris wanted to speak to her, but he was terrified of talking to her. He needed her though, she agreed to help him with meeting his sister, which she said they would do today.

"Hawke…" Fenris started, but caught his words in his mouth when she turned around

Hawke's shoulders slumped low, her head hanging, she looked…defeated. Broken even. Fenris winced, inhaling sharply at the sight of her.

"What do you want, Fenris?"

He clenched his fists, "I'm sorry to even ask, but I'd really like to follow up on my sister…" he cast his gaze to the side of her, he couldn't bare to see her reaction.

Hawke straightened up, realizing that she had already agreed to help, "Yes...sorry. I'll meet you outside of the Hanged Man in an hour."

"Right. Thanks Haw-"

She merely raised her hand to stop him, and started back to her home, she wasn't sure how she would do this. She knew though, that she couldn't let him do this alone, no matter what had happened between them.

* * *

><p>Fenris stood enraged, hurt, betrayed, confused, he didn't know what to do. He had just been betrayed by his own flesh and blood, so that she could become a magister. He let his sister free after being encouraged not to kill her. Even though he would have effortlessly ripped her heart out just as easily as anyone. Danarius was dead, Hadriana was dead and Fenris learnt that he wanted the markings, his entire world was throwing askew. His mind was racing, but he felt the world around moving slowly.<p>

"I thought discovering my past would bring a sense of belonging, but I was wrong. Magic has tainted that too, there is nothing left for me to reclaim…" He turned, gazing down at the floor, "I am alone."

Hawke took a step towards him, wanting to comfort him, be there for him, she had no idea what to do, what to say, "I'm here, Fenris."

He slowly gazed up at her, her heart wrenched for him, she could see the pain in his eyes, he lifted his hand up to her face and gave her that sad longing look that he wears so well, He turned from her contemplating what to say, and furrowed his brow turning around to look to her, "You heard what Varania said, I wanted these, I fought for them. I feel unclean like this magic has not only etched into my skin but has also stained my soul," he started towards the door shaking his head, "Let's go, I need to get out of here."

Hawke went with him silently, she did not want him to be alone. Anything that had happened between them, the held animosity and hurt had slipped away for this time. She had no idea what he was going through, and felt that their relationship problems now seemed isignifiant. Not only had he found out he had a sister, found out she was a mage who was trying to become a magister, but also found out that he **wanted** these markings, that he competed for them. That was beyond his imagination, for so many years he believed that they he got them unwillingly, that they forced him to go through such agony. His head was spinning and his heart felt heavy, he did not know how to grasp everything.

Fenris paced in front of his fireplace, explaining what little he could that he was thinking, she said whatever she could that sounded right in her head, trying to just let him talk instead of comforting him, she knew that would do nothing. He showed her a glimpse into his thoughts of killing Danarius, and not knowing what to do next, she knew this would be her chance, and she took it.

"Perhaps it is time to move forward, I just don't know where that leads, do you?" His eyes caught hers.

"Wherever it leads, I hope it means we'll stay together." Hawke was unsure how he would take this, but she felt it was now or never.

He let a small smile escape his lips, "That is my hope as well," he paused, "We have…never discussed what happened between us three years ago."

"You didn't want to talk about it." She shrugged her shoulders, "I didn't really want to prod."

"I felt like a fool," he looked down, remembering that night that would cause his so much pain, "I felt it better if you hated me. I deserve no less, but it isn't better," he flinched and rose from his seat, "That night, I remember your touch as if it were yesterday. I should've asked your forgiveness long ago. I hope you can forgive me now." He studied her, calculating her expression.

"I understand, I always…understood." She said as reassuring as possible, even if she didn't fully understand a part of her did.

"If there is a future to be had," he leaned down in front of her, looking her straight in the eye, "Then I will walk into it gladly at your side."

Hawke stood up and they embraced each other in a kiss, his hand placed gently behind her head, they kissed tenderly, it was different, it felt different, he felt lighter.

She pulled away from him and biting her lip and slightly furrowing her brow, she wants to talk more about it, but is unsure if this is the time.

Fenris saw her look, the fear in her eyes, he grabs her face and cups it with his hand, "What is it? Are you okay?"

She nods and nuzzles his hand, his touch is electrifying to her, it sends shivers down her spine, "I'm fine, this all just feels…unreal."

He chuckled, "Yes, I agree. If you wish, I do not mean to hold you here. You have…no obligations to stay with me." He stared into her eyes.

"No, no. I do not wish to leave, I do not want you to be alone after all…of this." She hugged him, but pulled back quickly, "You're armor is one of the most uninviting things I have ever encountered, however." She poked his shoulder spikes with her finger.

"Ah! I'm sorry. I am so accustomed to having it on, I usually don't go around hugging people believe it or not." He smirked as he started to pull of his armor pieces.

Hawke giggled, "It's so weird to see you without your armor."

"Is it? Well hopefully you'll be seeing it a lot more." He pulled her close and hugged her tightly, she wrapped her arms around him and laid her head on his chest.

"So…should I avoid the subject of your sister? I don't want to upset you if it can be avoided."

"Mm," he thought for a moment, "No, there's no reason to avoid it anymore."

"We'll figure this out, together. No running anyone, promise? If it's too much I…I can give you space."

He pulled away from her and sternly looked into her eyes, "I do not want space. I'd rather die than live another day without you. Three years was enough, I may not know how to…deal with some feelings but I won't leave you." he assured her.

"You better not, you're stuck with me now," she shrugged and slyly smiled at him.

"I have missed that smile," he said, tipping her chin up with his fingers, "you have no idea what you do to me, Hawke." he kissed her deeply and rubbed his hands up and down her back.

"Fenris," she broke his kiss, becoming too wound up, "Would you…like to come back to my estate tonight?" she placed her fingers lightly on his temples, and traced down to his markings, he shuddered under her touch, "Maybe try some…memory therapy?" Meekly smiling at him, embarrassed she was actually propositioning him to stay the night.

He chuckled, "Mm. I would like that, yes."

Fenris slipped back into his armor, he knew better than to walk around town at night without it. He offered his arm to her as they left his mansion and walked the few blocks to her estate. They both were nervous, knowing what tonight would entail but also having no idea how tonight would be, how it would feel.

When they reached Hawke's place, walking into the door they realized that everyone had been asleep, the fire was dimly lighting the front room. Hawke looked to Fenris who was looking into the fire, he had a very serious, intense but calm look on his face. She felt her heart flutter against her chest, she had no idea how he could affect her the way that he does.

"Are you hungry, Fenris?"

He heard her speak, but it did not register at first, "Hm?" he quietly said, still staring into the fire.

"Are you hungry? I could make us something to eat, if you would like."

"Oh, sorry. Yes, I would actually, come to think of it I haven't ate anything in two days." He trailed off.

"Maker's breath, Fenris! Two days? Go to the study if you would like, you can wait there and I will bring you some tasty food."

"You don't have to, Hawke, I don't want to trouble you."

She smiled at him, and leaned in kissing him lightly, "It wouldn't be a trouble at all.

He nodded, "I'll brush up on my reading then," he smirked at her, "I'm sure I'll find something interesting to read."

* * *

><p>Hawke brought up plates of food on a tray, Fenris looked up and his eyes widened when he saw all of the food.<p>

"Hawke! Y-you did not have to make all of this for me!"

"It's not all for you," she raised her eyebrow at him, "to the tell you the truth I haven't ate a thing all day. So I'm famished."

They sat together eating away, mostly concenrating on the delicious food. Hawke questioned him about his reading, if he was practicing. They had stopped their reading lessons after **that** night, much to both of their dismay. He admitted that he hadn't read much, that even that reminded him of her.

He quickly devoured the food, she ate slightly less than him. She was surrpised at how much this lanky man could eat.

"That was very good, Hawke. I had no idea you could cook."

She playfully scoffed, "What you think the only thing I can do is swing daggers around? I'll have you know I do have **some **womanly ways."

"Oh, I do not doubt that." He smirked at her, his eyes lighting up.

She gazed into his eyes and she started to feel that tingle in her, it rose up into her heart, and her throat, and moved down into her lower region. She licked her lips and rose from her chair.

"I'll take these back to the kitchen," She gathered up the plates and stacked them on the tray.

He grabbed her hand, "No, allow me to. You've done enough." He pulled the tray away from her and leaned in to her, brushing his lips against hers he breathed, "Go and take a bath, and I will clean up what I can." He hated cleaning, he hadn't touched a single thing in his mansion but for some reason the thoughts of helping her didn't seem so bad. He wanted to do this, this feeling he had was a strange one indeed.

"What if-" she stopped, biting her lip and looking down, "what if you…joined me instead?" She smirked out of embarrassment, she couldn't believe this was really happening, after so many years of wanting him, it was all falling into place.

She caught him off guard and his eyes widened in surprise he shook it off with a small smile, "You would want me to join you? In your bath?"

"I would, if that's something you would like. I feel stupid now for even asking, it's just-"

He kissed her, pushing his lips onto hers, molding them under his, he nipped at her lip, he felt his trousers growing tighter. The thought of her in the bath, and her wanting him with her was almost unbearable. He wanted her right now, but he would wait, "Go, I will join you shortly"

Hawke giggled, as they parted ways, Fenris went into the kitchen with the tray and she went up to the bath. She filled up the large tub with hot water, and started to undress. She had many scars that littered her body, some of them she liked, she felt proud of them but some of them she felt made her ugly. She ran her fingers over them while she waiter for the water to cool. She gathered up some soaps and massage oil, she smiled to herself at the thought of rubbing his shoulders and back…he had been through rough times and she wanted to ease his pain…and tension.

She trailed her fingers in the water, and climbed it, the water stung her skin slightly, but she quickly found comfort in it's heat. She lie back against the curve in the tub, and relaxed herself, she was nervous, more nervous than she had been in a long time. She was waiting for him to come and take her like he did that night. _That night,_ her eyes shot open, _. What if it he leaves again? What if he realizes this was all to much. _She chewed on her lip nervously, and sighed. _Oh you're being daft. Just relax. He will come. _She lie back closing her eyes, and shortly after she did she felt eyes on her, and Fenris cleared his throat.


	4. Chapter 4

**Ah, thank you everyone for the reviews and the favored story, every time I get an email saying my story was added to a favorites list I glow with glee! So here's chapter four, it is...incredibly dirty. I have written smut before, but never for a story, usually just for shits and giggles. Please be kind, I adore these two together so much and just *had* to write this. If you like it lemme know and I'll do more, if you don't like it tell me and I will avoid it! Thank you again for reading and enjoy.**

**Just another warning, this chapter has smut. Lots of dirty, smutty, smut, actually it's pretty much all smut this chapter so avoid if you don't want to read it *grins* I do not own any of these lovely characters as much as I'd love to be Hawke and have that gorgeous elf.**

Fenris stood there in the doorway, leaning against the frame, his mouth peaked up into that gorgeous smirk of his. He sauntered in and stood on the opposite side as her, taking in the sight of her, she looked down and he saw her cheeks flushed with a light pink.

"You look beautiful."

She blushed harder, "Thank you. Now, you get in here." she brightly smiled at him, beckoning him with her finger.

"Ahem. Close your eyes." He was embarrassed to undress in front of her, his lyrium tattoos were ugly to him. They deformed him, made him something different than everyone else.

She frowned at him, and he gave her that sad pleading look that made her heart melt, "Fine," she softly said and shut her eyes.

After a few moments of Fenris shuffling about she felt him slide into the water across from her. She opened her eyes and he was just lowering himself in, she caught a glance of his slender but muscular chest and so many beautiful tattoos. She inhaled, her breath taken away. She had forgotten that there were so many of them, she wanted to touch them, trace them with her finger. He looked up to see that she had opened her eyes and gave her a pained glare.

"I'm sorry, I am not comfortable with these hideous tattoos." He relaxed in the water, giving her those sad puppy eyes.

She slid over to him, stopping in front of him. She put her hand on his chest and lightly traced the markings with her fingers, and kissed them. She brushed her lips against his neck, and his chest, letting her hand slide down to his stomach, feeling his hard member lightly slide against her hand. He allowed a small gasp to escape his lips and shuddered under her touch.

"I...Fenris, I love you, for all of you. You're beautiful to me," she ran her hand through his hair, letting it fall down on the side of his face, she cupped his cheek with her hand, "Your hair, your eyes, and especially these," she kissed his the tattoos on his chin

"You…said-" he paused, hesitating, "you said you loved me? How? How could you love me after everything?"

She pulled back, to look at him in the eyes, her face sincere, "I have loved you since that day that we…" she trailed off, "and I have not stopped loving you. I was hurt, yes but I had hoped that maybe someday…you would be able to move on and that we could be together."

"I am so sorry. I was…terrified. I have never been close to anyone, ever. If I was I do not remember it, and I have certainly never felt what I felt with you that night. Then to remember everything, I didn't know how to deal with that," he grimaced, "I couldn't deal with that, so I just left. I ran like a coward. Once I found out I had a sister, I knew I needed you. I wanted you with me, I had no idea how'd I even begin to ask for you help. I'm glad it happened, I feel I can move on now. I may not know how to, that is why I hope you will guide me."

She hugged him tightly, her arms wrapped around his neck. She kissed him, below the ear, and he shivered, she lightly sucked on his earlobe and nipped at it, whispering into his ear, "I know, I understand. I am here for you, no matter what."

He grabbed her and pulled her onto of him, she inhaled sharply out of surprise and from feeling his hardness on her ass. He planted his lips hard onto hers, kissing her deeply and sensually, his tongue slipping into her mouth, lapping at her own. She kissed him back and nibbled on his lower lip, he groaned as she felt him grind into her. His hand went from her neck, then down to her shapely breasts, he massaged them firmly, cupping them and then finding her nipples he lightly pinched them in between is thumb and pointer finger. He went from one breast to the other, pulling at her nipples while she let little moans vibrate in her throat as they kissed. She lay on top of him, fully under his control.

He had one hand under her back, supporting her, and the other hand moved from her breast down her stomach, he glided his fingers against her feeling her muscles under her skin. His hand stopped above her slit, resting on her mound. She silently pleaded for him to touch her deeper, she pushed herself towards his hand and he chuckled, "Mmm you want me to touch you?"

She nodded, and pleaded with her eyes, biting her lower lip.

"Tell me, tell me what you want me to do."

"I want…I want your fingers on me, rubbing my spot. Please…" She loved that he was so dominant in sex.

"Mm, yes. I can do that…" He slid two fingers in her, sliding them up and down on her hot inner lips. He middle finger found her sensitive spot, he started to circle it, she was incredibly wet, his finger slid around it effortlessly. He firmly rubbed it, applying more pressure slowly, he felt her start to push into his hand, and he smiled. She had her eyes closed, and she started to breathe heavier, moaning and squirming in his lap. This only made his cock harder under her, he could not wait to have her. To feel her against him, he moaned from himself thinking of her, feeling her warmth on his hand.

He stopped suddenly, and she whined in disappointment, "Don't stop," she pleaded.

"Not yet, I want to taste you." He growled and lifted her out of the water, wrapping her in a towel and then himself, he carried her into her bed chamber.

Her placed her gently onto the bed, and leapt on top of her, hovering over her he kissed her on the lips sweetly, then started his way down, kissing her neck, her chest, her nipples, he stopped to suck lightly on each one, teasing each nipple with his teeth. She moaned sheepishly underneath of him and squirmed, his touch was like electricity pulsating through her, she was drunk off of his touch. He reached her sex, and placed his hands under her thighs, he wrapped his arms under her and slid her towards him, lifting up her legs and placing them on his shoulders. He spread her delicate lips using his thumb and pointer finger, causing her suck in air at his touch letting small groans escape her lips. He slid his other hand up to her, pushing his middle and pointer finger in her folds, teasing her opening, she bucked against him, trying to push his fingers inside of her, he grinned and slid them inside of her.

She moaned louder, pressing her head back into the pillow. He pushed his finger inside her tightness, gliding them in and out, he wanted her badly, he had forgot what she felt like, what she smelt like and he hadn't gotten to taste her their first time. He lowered his head to her sweetness, and licks her tender lips, slowly teasing her, he stuck his tongue into her and found her bundle of nerves, his traced his tongue around it as she bucked again into him, groaning.

"Oh Fenris, yes. Please…"

He loved when she begged, nothing more satisfied him, he let her squirm for a moment longer and then started pressing against her clit. He lapped at it with hungry, twirling his tongue around it, trying to find that exact spot that she would go wild. He worked his tongue faster, putting more pressure on her bud. All the while he was working his fingers inside of her, pressing against her other spot.

She grinded against his hand, wanting more, "Yes…Fenris. Oh Maker, yes!"

He moaned at the sound of her, he felt her muscles tense around his fingers as he licked her faster in circles his tongue attacking her. She suddenly was hush for a split second, her body tensed and she felt the build up that was inside of her explode wildly.

She moaned loudly, her chest heaving up and down, "Oh my…Fenris that was…the best thing I have ever felt. How did you know how to do that?" She stretched her neck to look at him.

He wiggled his fingers inside of her, and lapped up her sweet juices before leaving her sex, "Mm, that's not something we should talk about. You don't need to know, all that matters is that this will not be the last time you feel this way."

She quickly realized why he didn't want to talk about it, "Oh…sorry."

He slinked up to her, as if she were his prey, he glared at her with lust and love in his eyes, a slight smirk rested on his mouth. He hovered over her, taking in the sight of her messy hair, slightly sticking to her face with sweat, her cheeks flushed with her orgasm. He kissed her, letting her taste her own sweetness.

She lowered her hand to hardness and brushed her fingertips against his throbbing head, he had never been so turned on before, he certainly never got pleasure in doing it ever, until her. He closed his eyes laying his head on her shoulder and groaned, he could not wait to feel the inside of her, to fully take her again. She wrapped her hand around his cock, and slowly slid her hand up and down on it, teasing the head occasionally.

"Fenris…?"

"Mm?" He nuzzled his head into her neck.

"I want you, inside of me."

His head snapped up at her words, if he was any more turned on he would have exploded just from her saying that, he moaned and nipped at her lower lip, sucking on it, "As you wish."

He rose above her and knelt between her legs, he lifted them up so they would rest at his sides, to enter her better. He looked into her eyes before entering, "I love you." he pushed himself into her, only halfway, and let her adjust to his size. She cried out when she felt him push his hard cock into her, and gasped softly. This made Fenris proud, knowing that he was of…more than adequate size. When she started grinding against him, he pulled out and then slid his cock fully into her, she moaned out in surprise and pleasure. He allowed her to adjust to him more, he started to thrust in and out of her, he leaned over her and she wrapped her arms around his back, raking her nails into him. He moaned along with her, feeling her warm tightness slide over his aching cock. His memory of her was not nearly as good as it is now, the Lyrium started glowing under his skin, his head was drunk on lust and love. He pumped himself in slowly, hitting her spot, and pulled out only to press back into her. She grinded her hips into him, pushing him deeper, moving in sync with one another.

"Oh, Maker, you are so big!" She blurted out

He slowed his pace, "I'm not hurting you am I?"

"No! Please, do not slow down. It feels…wonderful."

"Ungh, you feel wonderful, my love" He quickened his pace, thrusting into her harder and faster. The sound of skin hitting skin and juices flowing filled the room, along with moans and gasps of air from the both of them.

Fenris felt himself getting closer to the end with every thrust, his cock was throbbing inside of her, "Mm, I'm very close."

"Fenris, I want you to come inside of me." She lowered her hand to her clit and rubbed it while he pumped away, their bodies fitting together perfectly, his cock hitting her gspot with ever inward movement, her finger gliding over her clit, bring her closer ever second.

Fenris pushed himself in and out with urgency, he was going to come, he felt a wave of pleasure overcome him and he thrust into her one last time, suddenly, Fenris was unaware of everything, he glowed brighter than ever when a wave of memories flashed before him again, he cried out as he came into her, as quick as the memories appeared, he was snapped back into the moment when she cried out as well.

"Fenris…oh…my Fenris." She breathed, her limbs collapsing.

He let his body relax on top of hers, leaving his still hard cock inside of her, lightly pushing in and out until he came to a slow stop.

They both fell quiet, except for their gasps for air, she was concerned, and worried. Everything was perfect, but she thought the same about the last time. She couldn't help but worry.

"Are you…alright?" She thought out loud.

He looked up to her, his expression soft but she could see the distress in his eyes, "I…I am?" He questioned himself as he said it, he saw her look of confusion and worry, "No, I am. I did have flashes again…but there's no need to worry." He kissed her, strongly, confidently. He would not leave her again, he couldn't.

"I'm sorry to doubt…"

"No. You have the reasons, I gave you reasons. I will prove to you that I will not leave you. It will take time, I understand." He gazed into her eyes, and shifted beside her, resting on his side with his head propped up by his hand.

"Oh, here…" She got up and went over to her wash bowl, dipping a cloth into the water and then wringing it out. She slid back on the bed and handed him the cloth, "for…you know." she giggled.

"Ah, yes. Thank you." He smiled, and wiped her juices off of him, when he was finished her threw the cloth over to the wash bowl, making it in, but not without a splash.

"Good aim," she smirked at him, and then pounced him, pushing him down on his back. She planted a kiss on his lips, holding her lips there. She released the kiss and pulled the many blankets up over them. He extended his arm, inviting her to lie her head on his chest.

"You are one hell of a woman, Hawke." He kissed the top of her head

She smiled and closed her eyes, "You are one hell of an elf, Fenris."

They fell asleep together, both of their minds finally quiet and peaceful, except for the dreams.


	5. Chapter 5

**Hey all, here's a shorter chapter. Please read and review! I'm loving all the favorite story notifications but I'd love some feedback!  
>As always I own none of the characters in this. <strong>

Fenris' mind drifted off, he had not fallen asleep this fast in years, except for when he was completely smashed, but that was more him passing out from drunkeness. He found himself in a dungeon, it felt familiar as if he'd been here before, but it wasn't anywhere he recognized. His hand wondered to his neck, there was a cold tightness around it, he felt a collar tightly strapped to his neck, he tugged on it when suddenly panic set in. _No, no this isn't happening. I'm not here. I'm free, I'm not a slave!_ He ventured forward down the dank passage, he felt as if he knew where he was going, but he didn't know where he would end up.

Walking into a slightly more open area, he realized that these were barracks, slave barracks. He saw figures behind bars, some of them huddled in the corner, some of them just standing or sitting. They all saw him walk in, he felt like he vaguely recognized them, they were familiar but he could not make out their faces.

"Please Fenris, let us go. We did nothing to be put here, we can help you get out. You just have to let us out." A female voice pleaded with him

He felt himself speak, "No. I cannot." he didn't feel like it was him saying those words. Everything about this felt wrong.

His feet led him down more passages, through doors, and up stairs until he arrived at what seemed to be some sort of throne room, he looked around and saw the room was heavily decorated, it smelled sweet and was much warmer and inviting than where he came from.

"Fenris," a voice hissed from the chair in front of him, familiar yet he could not pin it.

He could not make out who the figure was, although he could very well see her, but her features were undistinguishable. He knew it was female and she was dressed in magister clothes, which only led to a a peign in his stomach. He noticed another figure, who was male standing proudly next to her with his hand on her shoulder. The fear inside of him rose up, he felt his chest begin to tighten. _No, how can this be? I'm not a slave. I am not a slave!_ As he walked up to the figure, he unwillingly bowed in front of her.

"Oh my little Fenris, how loyal you are." she cackled, and pet his head.

The woman's touch felt painful to him, it was like a static charge went through his body, he could not move, he could not speak. He was disgusted at himself but could do nothing about it.

"So loyal that you would…kill someone dear to you perhaps?"

_Someone dear to me? Who do I have that's close to me? I have no one._

One of her person guards grabbed his arm and forced him to turn around, then what he saw he had no comprehension of. His face twisted in confused, when he saw that the person they were going to force him to kill, was himself.

"Go ahead, Fenris. Kill him, for me." The woman purred to him.

He struggled to keep his feet where they were, but he felt himself effortlessly moving towards his other self. Instead, he found himself sauntering over while his tattoo's blazed. He grabbed his clone by the throat and saw the look of horror in his eyes, his own eyes.

"Please, don't…let her…do this to you."

"Do it Fenris, don't listen to him. He doesn't know what's right." She demanded

"No! You know who you are," the familiar voice yelled at him, "Do NOT let her taint your mind." He growled.

"Fenris," the woman snapped, "He does not want you to be happy, I can make you happy. Destroy him."

"No, please, do not do this-"

As soon as he breathed the last word, Fenris plunged his fist into his chest. His hand easily felt his heart and crushed it with a single motion.

He removed his arm from the lifeless body, and turned away from it. _How is this happening? What is this? Who is making me do this?_

"Fenris, come here."

He obeyed silently and knelt down in front of his unknown master, he felt a finger slip under his chin, beckoning him to look up at her face.

"Look at me, love."

As he lifted his head, she was no longer a mysterious figure to him. He could make out every detail of her and his heart sank, he felt as if he was going to throw up, his head spun dizzily.

It was her, she was his new master. Hawke sat in front of him, with a sly smile that had only ill intentions. Her eyes cold and unloving, looking at him as a pet, as property. They were not the eyes he gazed into the night before, he wanted to run, far away but couldn't even shift his feet.

"You are mine, Fenris. I own you, and you will follow my word," she laughed "and you thought you were free now." Hawke shook her head at him, looking at him pathetically.

"I-" he chocked out, he was trying so hard to speak, "I- am…not…" he stammered, the words would not come out. He bit the inside of his cheek, and tried harder, and harder until he lowered his head, huffing from exhaustion. "I am…yours."

The figure next to her scoffed, "Why you continue to keep this thing so close to you is beyond me. You shouldn't need him, I'm here love."

Fenris' gaze shifted to the figure who now had a face, a name. Anders. Fenris growled to himself, rage building up inside of him. He was next to her, his hand moved from her shoulder and curled into his own chest, crossing him arms. Fenris felt his heart rip apart inside of his chest, he growled to himself. He wanted to leap at the abomination, rip his heart out slowly from his chest. His anger was filling him up, he was almost on the verge of tears even.

"Now, now my love," her words spilled out like venom, Fenris cringed, "he certainly has his uses," she lifted her hand from the arm rest, raising it up so that the back of her hand met his chest, she let it trail down to the top of his pants, she twisted her hand and grabbed his manhood, "as do you." she purred.

Fenris felt himself start to fall apart, he couldn't breath, he felt no air going into his lungs, his chest felt so heavy, he suddenly had vertigo, his mouth dry and heart broken. _Why him? Why that abomination? What is this?_

Anders groaned in front of him, he was obviously turned on by her touch, something Fenris knew much about. Anders pushed her hand away and pouted, pathetically, obviously a ruse.

"Oh come now," she huffed, "shall we retire to the chamber?"

Anders glanced down at her, and shot his head back, turning away from her and falsely pouting, "I suppose."

"Oh stop it," she rolled her eyes at him and rose up from her throne, she grabbed Anders' hand and then she put her other hand on Fenris' head, petting him, stroking his hair with her hand. She looked to the guards standing on the opposite side as Anders, "Take him back to his room, he's been a good boy so let him do as he pleases, maybe even give him a book," she started laughing, Anders joined in as they walked away together.

Fenris shot up from slumber, dripping in sweat and gasping for air. He suddenly had a large headache that felt like his head was in a vice grip. He brought his hand up to the bridge of his nose and pinched. He eyes hurt, his neck felt strained, it felt as if he was beaten badly. He shifted, Hawke stirred next to him which startled him. He had completely forgotten he slept with her that night since his dream plagued him mind, he was terrified. He swallowed hard and felt a roughness in his throat.

Peeling the blankets off of him, he slid out of the bed, wrapping the towel from earlier around his waist, he headed down the stairs towards the kitchen. He leaned against the counter, sipping water. Thinking of his dream, his nightmare. _Her pet…pfagh. Of course she would be with that…abomination. _He shook his head, he always had doubts about the relationship between them, three years she was alone, surely she took comfort in another mans arms. He saw the way Anders looked at her every day, and every time it pissed Fenris off to no end. Then his thoughts trailed into the events that unfolded earlier, her words, her touch he felt conflicted in his feelings. _I love her, she waited for me, so she said. _He hung his head, sighing loudly, not knowing what to think, or feel. He gulped down the last of his water and peeked outside to see how dark it was, it looked to be maybe around 4am, the night was fading into a dull morning. He paused for a moment, unsure how he should handle the situation, should he even mention the nightmare to her? He groaned, thinking about telling her his fears of that abomination and her together, pulling himself together he pushed himself up the stairs back into bed, thinking of how to face her.


End file.
